[On Marcelo goal for Real Madrid] Again he takes a game by the sc

[On Messi goal against Villareal] This is an electric eel covered in vaseline comin

Real Madrid, man. Cometh the hour – the death hour – that’s when

[On Suárez goal from Sergi Roberto assist] You better lock your b

Brave header. The Charruas [Uruguay national team], man – they wi

[On Ronaldo goal for Real Madrid against Valencia goalkeeper] He

[On Messi winning goal for Barcelona against Real Madrid in El Clasico] A

[On a Cristiano Ronaldo free kick goal against Atletico Madrid] Are you kidding me?!

Both these defences have been working harder than a one-eyed cat, covering 3 mouse holes.

He’s a one-man battleship, [David] De Gea. Where’s his critics now?